The Magic of Winston Ragoo October 24
Winston Ragoo is considered by many to be the Nostradamus of Trinidad. He predicted the untimely death of former Prime Minister Patrick Manning, though not until after his funeral. He prophesied the election of Dr. Rowley, who had been fired from Manning’s cabinet for what the official axe called “hooligan behavior.“ In a land with political intrigue but no proper polling, Ragoo is gainfully employed as public palm reader and parliamentary prognosticator, earning headlines in the The Guardian and Newsday.
“Why Rags doh hush he stink mout’, playin’ cheap politic in guise,“ says one vocal critic, an anonymous ombudsman from the editorial board of the street.
Ragoo’s prophesies tickle superstitious urges with wishful promises for the future. Yes, you will survive this latest setback; yes, you will make more money next year; yes, there will be harmony; yes, you will find love. Peddling dreams like these is tarot-man’s business model, and he fills assembly halls with believers. His accurate premonitions have made him famous, his timing not so much. He apparently forecasted the August earthquake, but in September. Like the PM Manning claim, publicity came late, only after the fact, essentially a forecast of the immediate past.
However, Ragoo predicts this will change. He warns of another earthquake, a bigger one. He says the crime situation will worsen, PM Rowley’s hooligan stock will rise, and the floods will return. He’s playing the odds that he’s guessing right, betting on a terrible future, and he’s making a fortune doing it.
“All dat to say he huv a boat and a drive-a.“
The T&T Newsday, one of our two papers of record, sent investigative reporter Melissa Dassrath to profile Winston Ragoo recently, and this is what she writes, for real:
“Psychic and Tarot Master Winston Ragoo reveals the secrets to what is at present and what is yet to happen in the future.“
This opening line rivals Plan Nine’s From Outer Space: “We are all interested in the future because that is where we are going to spend the rest of our lives.“ But I digress, Ms. Dassrath, please continue with your expose:
“In a millisecond he is transported out of his being and travels across the expanse of the universe and connects with someone else’s energy, mind, aura, and spirit.“ Unless, of course, that special “someone else“ is sitting before you, in which case we can eliminate the “expanse of the universe“ cost and get straight to the other stuff, in a nanosecond.
“When you walk into his office at 58 Alberto Street, Woodbrook, you will not see any spooky images or crystal balls, nor will the acrid scent of incense linger in the air. The air-conditioned room resembles an office space and is very minimalistic, professional, and comfortable. Ragoo himself, 40, is unexpectedly youthful and quick talking. He is trendy, tattooed, chatty, and welcoming. Interestingly, Ragoo had told a Newsday colleague about me months ago—long before I ever heard of him or thought about doing a story.“
Yes, “interestingly“ is exactly right, Missy! Sir Winston the Mindreader is playing a professional journalist like a greased steel pan. Melissa, I am going to travel back into the past and predict you will write a story about me in the newspaper. In the future. Same as it ever was.
The story is that Winston Ragoo stumbled onto his special gift at Coney Island, Brooklyn US, from a “gypsy lady on the boardwalk,“ sort of like Tom Hanks in Big. The witch told him he needed to go home and save his people, so he made Trinidad his mission.
“I am pure and so that is why I have the capacity to unlock my psychic powers. Additionally, everything about my message is love.“ I wonder if one Newsday correspondent discovered this the hard way. I predict she might get another interview.
The anonymous ombudsman says, “Walk to hum and hit um ah wet hand and ask him how come he doh see dut in dee future.“